Reemergence
Starting over (and over) (and over) (and over)
There are a number of new followers here, plus the publication of my next book is just a couple of weeks (technically 12 days) away, so, first of all, thanks for signing up for this newsletter, and second, who is this goddamned person you’re getting newsletters from?
Pictured above in my tortured adolescence, photo by my sister, who was only 13 or so at the time. Now she’s a professional photographer.
Nobody has updated my Wikipedia page in years, and unlike every other writer seems to do, I don’t actually update it myself. So don’t bother visiting there (unless you’re a Wikipedia editor, in which case, please visit there and update my page before someone marks it for deletion). Because I’m a teacher, I like bullet points, so here are the basics:
I was born and raised in Oakland, California, a complicated, misunderstood, underrated city that I deeply love and root for. That’s where I still live. My mom was a teacher in the Oakland schools and my dad worked in admin at a small Catholic college. I’m the forth of five kids which also means Irish Catholic, often broke. And being forth of five I’m the one who got left behind at the grocery store most often.
I don’t like starting sentences with “I.”
Since 1999 I’ve taught writing at UC Berkeley. Mostly first year comp and second year research writing, which is actually a great job, and thanks to the union I eventually became a Senior Continuing Lecturer which means “no tenure, but some basic job security and benefits.” My course themes right now are “unpacking gender” (hard work and fun) and “music and social movements" (hard work and so much fun). Luckily I also get to teach advanced creative nonfiction, culture writing, and sometimes guest gigs teaching at arts residencies, in church basements, and at senior centers.
Once upon a time I was 5’10” but my HMO insists I’m 5’9”, but they LIE. Also, I was diagnosed with breast cancer in September of 2023 and have written about breast cancer as a social justice issue in this newsletter. The triathalon of surgery, chemo and radiation was completed in March of this year and I’m on a targeted treatment for two years and hormone blockers for five, so I’m actually still in treatment. Contrary to what many people think, cancer is not a one and done. But thanks to an all-women medical team I’m still here.
My first book wasn’t published until I was nearly 40, which is not how most writers want their career to go, but those are the breaks. Then I went and wrote six books in 15 years which I do not recommend.
Kids were never something I was much compelled to have, so I didn’t, but I have been in a relationship with the same dude for (uses calculator) 27 years. He is a musician and a private person and doesn’t really use social media because he’s smarter than me.
Before I got sick I was a very active freelancer, writing a column and doing reported features, analysis, op/eds and culture writing. Since I got sick that has pretty much come to a halt, and it’s going to be a slow, painful slog trying to get editors’ attention again, assuming they haven’t all been laid off. The media industry, as you know, has taken hit after hit and some really talented editors I’ve worked with have given up and quit the business, as have many of my journalist friends.
That being said, unlike a lot of Substackers I don’t think this model is “disruptive” (if you live in the Bay Area like I do, that word might give you hives), and like every other social media platform, it rewards people who already arrived with a large built in audience. Substack, like every other tech company, has also decided that writing should be gamified, so it’s constantly prodding people to write more and more and rewarding people with bigger audiences with badges and more promotion. In other words, it’s yet another platform for popular kids, and like so many other apps, who knows how long it will last. So I remain skeptical and A. because I have a day job and B. this app has some serious issues with content moderation, and C. if you’re going to pay for writing, it should be edited and copy edited, which I try to do (but nobody should be their own editor, so you should spend that money supporting a newspaper or magazine that keeps editors employed), I don’t charge for this newsletter.
Is it obvious yet that I’m a leftist?
What I write here is essentially what the title of the newsletter implies, the residuum of things I’ve been reading, watching, thinking about, ruminating over and considering. My forthcoming book is about the limits of forgiveness, so lately I’ve been writing about that. But my beats as a journalist usually land somewhere in the intersections of gender, religion, culture/media and education, but lately also breast cancer, so expect some of all of that. There’s no regular publishing schedule and I really try not to send more than one newsletter every couple of weeks because who has time? This is a low level commitment for readers.
You could be spending your time reading a lot of other things, so I deeply appreciate that you’ve chosen to read my work. Since I started my career late, it still amazes me that anyone reads my work at all. What a fucking miracle. Thank you.
More to come soon about my next book, Not So Sorry (FWIW, I do not recommend editing and launching a book during cancer treatment) when it arrives. This interview I did with Tony Ginocchio (the funniest person writing about religion) about the book was a ton of fun and serves as a good preview of the book.
Until then, thanks for being here.